GM. This is the Milk Road, the crypto newsletter that makes every Friday feel like a payday.

Here’s how we’re closing the week:

• 2 crypto nightmares in 1 day

• Flashback Friday

• Funding Friday

• Meme of the day

2 CRYPTO NIGHTMARES IN 1 DAY

Yesterday was a rough day for crypto.

And most of us probably woke up feeling like Ben Affleck.

No milk & cereal for breakfast, just straight cigs.

So, what happened? 2 big things:

1/ Binance’s (BNB) Chain was exploited for ~$560m

• A hacker was able to steal 2m BNB tokens (worth ~$560m)

• The hacker then tried cashing out funds through as many different liquidity pools & bridges as possible

• Tether and other platforms did the one thing they could to stop the hacker – blacklisting the address from making any withdrawals

• Binance also completely froze the BNB chain and suspended all activity

The chaos seems to be over and Binance has resumed activity on the chain. In the end, the hacker was only able to get away with ~$100m.

I know I know… "only ~$100m" is still a lot of money. But hey, it could've been way worse. It would've been the 3rd largest hack of all time if successful.

*sigh*….another week, another hack. Guess it's time to reset the “Days Since Last Incident” counter.

The second thing that happened yesterday might even be worse though…

2/ A 14,000-page Celsius court filing was released with every single Celsius user's personal information

The court wanted to show that Celsius executives withdrew millions of dollars before the company went bankrupt (the top 3 execs withdrew ~$50m in May).

But in the process, data for all of the users were also leaked. Names, balances, transaction IDs – everything.

Now every single Celsius user can be doxxed just by looking at the on-chain activity and leaked documents. No bueno.

At this point, I can't decide who should win Crypto's Sh*ttiest Player of the Year Award.

a/ Celsius

b/ Do Kwon

c/ 3 Arrows Capital

Reply to this email with your vote! We might just make a custom trophy to send to the winner.

TODAY'S EDITION IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY COMPOSER

We won't lie. 2022 has been brutal for investments.

Everything is down – high-flying tech companies, cryptocurrencies, NFTs, and hell even bonds have taken a beating so far this year.

But there's a better way to manage your portfolio than just staring & screaming at the charts to go up – using data and logic to help grow your wealth year over year.

That's where Opus from Composer comes in. With Opus, you get:

• a data-driven approach

• dynamic rules & automated trading that respond to market movements

• all in one, simple click

Yup, it's that easy.

Discover why over $1 trillion is managed by quant funds with Composer today.*

*Investing in securities involves risks, including the risk of loss. Composer Technologies Inc., SEC Registered RIA. All charts and symbols are provided for illustrative purposes only and are not intended as recommendations to purchase or sell any security and do not reflect actual market conditions, stock performance, or AI decisions.

FLASHBACK FRIDAY

Let’s take a trip down memory lane.

To October 2009:

• Microsoft had just released Windows 7

• Jay-Z had just dropped the Blueprint 3

• The “Balloon Boy Hoax” just happened (aka when everyone thought a UFO abducted some kid)

But the most underrated thing? New Liberty Standard, the first website you could buy Bitcoin on, was launched.

Here's what it looked like:

The crazy part? The first exchange rate was $1 USD = 1,578 BTC.

That's right. You could've gotten 1578 BTC for cheaper than Costco's 100% All Beef Hot Dog-and-Soda combo (aka the Meal of Champions).

And a $1 investment then, would be worth over $30m today.

Okay, it's officially decided. If Adam Sandler's life remote thing from Click ever becomes real, I know exactly where I'm rewinding to…

October 2009, baby!

FUNDING FRIDAY

Each Friday we give you a rundown of Web3 companies that got funded this week.

This week, we saw ~$151M get invested into crypto companies & funds. Here’s who got the money:

Juno got $18m to build a crypto-friendly bank. Finally, a bank that doesn't take you out back to shoot you in the knees every time you say the word "crypto".

Blackbird got $11m to create web3 loyalty programs for restaurants & their customers.

Blowfish got $11.8m to develop fraud protection for web3 wallets. Sure as hell know we all need some more of this…

StemsDAO got $4m to develop a web3 music collaboration platform. DJ Khaled x The Milk Road Productions coming soon…👀

If you wanna check out the complete database of companies that have raised money in 2022, we got 'em for you right here.

MEME OF THE DAY

That's a wrap for this week, ladies & gents. Stay thirsty & see ya next week!

If you want more, be sure to follow our Twitter (@MilkRoadDaily)

SAY HELLO TO VINT

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VITALIK PIC OF THE DAY

DISCLAIMER: None of this is financial advice. This newsletter is strictly educational and is not investment advice or a solicitation to buy or sell any assets or to make any financial decisions. Please be careful and do your own research.